I Interviewed 300 People About Their Depression—Here Are the 6 Most Common Lies It Tells People 

2. “You Are Unlovable and No One Really Cares”

Depression often whispers that your relationships are built on obligation rather than genuine care. 

• Many interviewees reported believing that their loved ones only tolerated them out of duty, not because they truly cared.
• But hearing others express the same fear made them realize that depression fabricates this lie to deepen isolation and self-loathing.
• The reality is that love is not conditional on your mental state. Your worth is not dictated by depression’s voice or any condition or diagnosis you might have.

🔗 Learn the seven benefits of social support in your recovery journey. 

3. “You Have No Value”

Self-worth often takes a direct hit when depression is in control, convincing individuals that they are useless and insignificant.

• Many people in my interviews admitted that their depression told them they had nothing to offer the world. I believed that myself, when I was in deep depression.
• Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) techniques suggest actively identifying and challenging these automatic negative thoughts. Others can help with that if you allow them. Consider saying: “I’ve been feeling like I have no value. Is that how you see me?”
• Finding small ways to contribute—whether through work, hobbies, or helping others—can begin to rebuild a sense of purpose. For me, starting the Giving Voice to Depression podcast gave me purpose, which allowed me to talk back to my depression when it told me I was useless.

💡 If you need help redefining your purpose, explore recovery options.

4. “Things Will Never Get Better”

A hallmark of depression is the illusion of permanence—the belief that this darkness will last forever.

• Every single person I spoke with who had recovered from a depressive episode once believed this lie. Believing that you will always be in depression’s darkness created hopelessness, which is a dangerous place to be, 
• Any value or goodness you experienced in the past, now feels over. In a depression, the present is usually unacceptable (or worse.) And the future, as your depressive thoughts will have you believe,  holds no promise whatsoever. Those thoughts (lies) combine to trap  you in a cycle of hopelessness.
• Seeking therapy, medication, or lifestyle changes can prove that healing is possible.

5. “Why Bother? Nothing Matters”

Apathy is one of depression’s most destructive tools, making even small tasks feel monumental.

• Interviewees described how depression convinced them that brushing their teeth, showering, or even getting out of bed had no point.
• But action fuels motivation—taking even the smallest step can begin a positive cycle of recovery. And often, we have to take those steps, however small, before we feel like taking them. An object at rest, stays at rest. 
• Recognizing this lie for what it is can help you break free from depression’s  grip. No matter what it says to you, life still matters. YOU still matter.

6. “The World Would Be Better Without You”

Perhaps the most dangerous lie depression tells is that your existence is a burden.

• Many of my interviewees admitted to having thoughts that their loved ones, pets, or coworkers would be better off without them.
• But hearing others share these thoughts made them realize that depression uses the same script for everyone.
• If you’ve had these thoughts, please know that they are not true, and that help is available. Reach out to a trusted friend, therapist, doctor, member of your faith community, a credible online group, mental health organizations or crisis hotline. In the U.S. you can call or text 988 24/7/365. Note: You do not have to be suicidal to access a hotline. They are crisis lines. You define what a crisis is for you. You can also call them on behalf of a loved one or friend and ask how to support and protect them when they’re struggling.

🚨 If you or someone you know is in crisis, reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988.

Pulling Back the Curtain: Exposing Depression’s Lies

Once I realized that everyone who described their depressive thoughts said the same things (not similar- the same,) I began to share that with my interviewees and asked them if learning that depression repeats identical  falsehoods to so many changed their perspective.

• Many said it was a revelation—depression wasn’t speaking  previously-unacknowledged truths about them, it was simply following a well-worn, destructive script. .
• One interviewee said, “If only I had known others heard these same lies, I might not have attempted (suicide.)”
• Understanding that these thoughts are symptoms, not truths can help reframe the way we approach depression. Sharing these thoughts with others in our lives, will help them better understand and support us. Note: Such conversations are much easier to have when we are not in depression’s dark pit.

How to Fight Back Against Depression’s Lies

If you recognize any of these lies in your own thoughts, here are a few steps to start challenging them:

1. Identify the Thought – When a negative belief surfaces, ask yourself, Would I say this to a friend? 
2. Find the Evidence – Depression thrives on falsehoods. Look for actual evidence that contradicts its claims. If able, ask yourself (or someone who knows and cares about you) if they believe what you’re thinking is true about you.
3. Reach Out – Talk to someone who can offer a different perspective—a friend, therapist, or support group or anyone you know also lives with depression (there are lots of us! It is a common condition.)
4. Engage in Small Actions – Even tiny tasks like getting out of bed or stepping outside can chip away at depression’s hold. I’ve learned from therapists to focus on how you will feel after doing a task such as showering, putting on clean sheets or taking a walk vs. all the energy and steps required to do them. 
5. Seek Professional Help – Therapy, medication, and holistic approaches can help break the cycle. There is absolutely no shame in reaching out for help and support. We see doctors for colds. Seeing a therapist or entering treatment for depression is no different. 

Final Thoughts: You Are Not Alone

Depression tells the same lies to millions of people, but recognizing them for what they are—a symptom of an illness—can lessen their power. You have value. You are loved. And things can get better.

If you or someone you know is struggling, don’t suffer in silence. There is hope, there is help, and there is a way forward.