What Are Eating Disorders? 10 Expert Answers On The Internet’s Most Searched Eating Disorder Questions

Eating disorders are everywhere, in conversations about body image, wellness trends, and social media. But despite how common they are, most people don’t actually understand what they are or how serious they can be.

In this episode of Recoverable, psychiatrist Dr. Elizabeth Wassenaar breaks down the truth behind eating disorders, answering the internet’s most searched questions with honesty and depth. One of her most powerful reminders is this— eating disorders are not about vanity or willpower. They are real, brain-based mental illnesses, and they can affect anyone.

1. What Does Disordered Eating Actually Mean?

It’s not about food, it’s about impact.

Disordered eating is a broad term, and that’s part of what makes it confusing. At its core, it means that your relationship with food is interfering with your ability to live your life.

That interference can look different for everyone. For some, it might mean constant preoccupation with food or calories. For others, it might involve behaviors like restricting, bingeing, or purging. The key question is simple— is this helping you live your life, or getting in the way of it?

Dr. Wassenaar explains that some behaviors are clearly disordered, like forcing yourself to throw up or using substances to manipulate calories. But others become normalized through culture, like extreme dieting trends or “hacks” that circulate online.

The tricky part is that disordered eating often hides in plain sight. It can look like discipline, health, or self-improvement, when in reality it’s quietly taking over your thoughts, time, and energy.

When Does It Become an Eating Disorder?

The difference between disordered eating and a diagnosable eating disorder comes down to two main factors— functional impairment and medical impact.

If your eating habits are affecting your mood, relationships, work, or daily functioning, that’s a red flag. If they’re also causing harm to your physical health, like malnutrition or other medical complications, it may meet the criteria for an eating disorder.

One of the most important takeaways is that you cannot tell by looking at someone if they have an eating disorder or not. Eating disorders do not have a “look,” and malnutrition can exist in any body.

2. Are Eating Disorders Mental Illnesses?

They start in the brain, not in behavior.

One of the biggest misconceptions is that eating disorders are just about behavior, such as eating too much or not eating enough. In reality, they are brain-based mental illnesses.

Dr. Wassenaar explains that the brains of people with eating disorders function differently. There are biological, genetic, and neurological components, just like with depression or anxiety.

What we see on the outside—food habits, weight changes, exercise patterns—is only the surface. The real struggle is happening internally in thoughts, beliefs, and brain wiring.

This is why simply telling someone to “just eat” or “just stop eating” doesn’t work. It’s not a lack of willpower. It’s a condition that requires comprehensive treatment, including psychological and medical support.

As Dr. Wassenaar puts it, one of the most harmful things you can say to someone with an eating disorder is “just stop.”

This misunderstanding keeps people from seeking help and reinforces shame. Recognizing eating disorders as mental illnesses opens the door to empathy, treatment, and recovery.

3. Can You Have an Eating Disorder If You Aren’t Skinny?

Yes, and this myth is dangerous.

This is one of the most searched questions online, and the clear answer is that yes, you can have an eating disorder if you are not skinny.

Eating disorders can affect people of any size, weight, gender, or background. You can have an eating disorder without losing weight, and you can have one while living in a larger body.

The myth that eating disorders only affect thin people leads to massive underdiagnosis. Dr. Wassenaar calls this a “huge travesty”, as many individuals never get screened, never self-identify, and never receive treatment simply because they don’t “look the part.”

This is why focusing on behaviors, thoughts, and life impact is far more important than focusing on weight or appearance.

4. What Are the Signs Someone Might Have an Eating Disorder?

Look for what’s being lost, not just what’s changing.

It’s natural to look for physical signs of eating disorders, like changes in weight or eating habits, but those don’t always tell the full story.

Instead, Dr. Wassenaar suggests paying attention to what matters to the person. Are they pulling away from relationships? Are they neglecting responsibilities? Are they spending more time thinking about food, exercise, or their body?

Eating disorders have a way of taking over priorities. Things that once mattered, such as friendships, family, and hobbies, can quickly start to fade into the background.

How to Talk to Someone You’re Worried About

If you’re concerned about someone, the way you approach the conversation matters. Instead of making assumptions or diagnoses, focus on what you’ve observed. For example, “I’ve noticed you don’t seem to enjoy things you used to, and I’m worried about you.”

This opens the door for conversation without putting the person on the defensive.

Avoid comments about weight or appearance. Even well-meaning remarks can reinforce harmful beliefs or make someone shut down.

At the core, it’s about connection. Let them know you care, and that they don’t have to go through it alone.

5. Can You Recover From an Eating Disorder?

Recovery is real, and it requires support.

One of the most powerful messages from this conversation is that eating disorders are not only treatable, but they are curable.

That doesn’t mean they disappear like a cold. Recovery doesn’t erase the experience. But it does mean you can live a full life without the disorder controlling you.

A key part of recovery is understanding that you can’t do it alone. In fact, believing you have to do it alone is often part of the illness itself.

Dr. Wassenaar puts it simply, “relationships replace eating disorders.”

What to Do If You Need Help Right Now

If you’re struggling, reaching out can feel like the hardest part, but it’s also the most important.

That might mean talking to a trusted friend, family member, therapist, or doctor. If you’re in crisis, you can contact the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988, or go to an emergency room.

There are also free online communities and support groups that can help you take the first step toward recovery.

You don’t need to have everything figured out. You just need to not be alone.

Come back next Thursday, May 7th, for part two of our conversation with Dr. Wassenaar!