Fighting Depression Daily: 11 Lessons on Strength, Stigma, and Support

This article is a summary of a powerful episode of the Giving Voice to Depression podcast, hosted by Terry McGuire. In this episode, Terry has an open and affirming conversation with Victor Armstrong, a mental health advocate and Director of North Carolina’s Division of Mental Health, Developmental Disabilities, and Substance Abuse Services. The discussion addresses stigma, strength, and the societal misconceptions that continue to haunt people living with depression.

The episode is a heartfelt reminder: depression is not a moral failure, and those who live with it are often among the strongest people we know. These 11 insights, drawn from Victor’s lived experience and wisdom, challenge outdated views and offer validation and hope to anyone navigating the darkness of mental illness.

1. Mental Illness Is Not a Weakness—It’s a Human Experience

Victor explained:

We migrate towards and celebrate things that we see as evidence of strength, and we tend to either shy away from or condemn those things that we perceive as weakness.

Recognizing depression or anxiety as human responses—not failings—is the first step in transforming how we support one another.

Instead of dismissing or labeling emotional suffering as personal failure, we must adopt a framework of empathy. This includes talking about mental health in our homes, schools, workplaces, and communities. By doing so, we validate the human experience and support those who need it.

2. People Living With Depression Are Fighting a Daily Battle

Victor offered a powerful reframe:

To have the strength to keep fighting to live is something that should be celebrated and not something that should be condemned.

Living with depression often means confronting the same exhausting struggle day after day. Getting out of bed, making meals, responding to texts—these tasks can become mountains. Yet people push through anyway. They survive. And that strength deserves recognition.

When we acknowledge how brave it is to simply stay alive and engaged in the world while in pain, we begin to change how society views mental health warriors.

3. Support Starts With Seeing the Person, Not Just the Behavior

Victor emphasized:

We need to focus not on the anger, not the frustration, not the disorganization, but the person who’s at the core of that… a person of value.

Too often, we interpret emotional symptoms as personal defects. A loved one’s irritability may be seen as rudeness, rather than as a cry for help. By shifting our focus from behavior to the person beneath it, we can offer meaningful support.

Simple acts like saying “I see you” or “How can I help?” can open doors for healing. Compassion is more powerful than correction.

4. The Pandemic Exposed Mental Health Vulnerabilities—In Everyone

Victor reflected:

There will be people who understand just how fragile our lives are and how fragile our mental wellness can be.

He also described the immense stress people faced:

You may have a mother who is now trying to balance doing her job and keeping her kids online for school during the day and then trying to maintain their household… or a father who may have lost his job… They’re trying to process all these things.

The global crisis of COVID-19 stripped away many illusions of emotional invincibility. It revealed that mental wellness is not guaranteed—it’s something that must be maintained, protected, and restored. For many, it was a humbling and transformative realization.

Mental health doesn’t discriminate. Rich or poor, young or old, any person can be pushed past their limits. That universal truth brings urgency to efforts aimed at building more supportive, resilient systems.

5. Awareness Is Not Enough—We Need Action

Victor cautioned:

While I’m optimistic, I’m not going to assume that we will move forward in the way that I would like to see us move forward.

Awareness campaigns have improved public dialogue about mental health. But without accessible, affordable care, awareness can ring hollow. Real change demands legislative support, workplace policies, and educational programs that provide long-term solutions.

Action also means checking in on each other, normalizing therapy, and dismantling barriers to access. A cultural shift requires more than conversations—it needs commitment.

6. Stigma Isn’t in Your Head—It’s Real and Widespread

Victor recalled:

All the years that I was going to church, I never heard of mental health or mental illness spoken about in the church.

The silence surrounding mental illness is not accidental. In many cultures, it’s taught—explicitly or implicitly—that mental health struggles are best kept hidden. But silence is not protection. It isolates and injures.

Validating the legitimacy of depression and anxiety is one way to begin undoing generations of misinformation. We can only combat stigma by naming it, challenging it, and refusing to be ashamed of what we are experiencing.

7. Mental Health Stigma Can Be Even More Devastating in Marginalized Communities

Victor described the painful intersection of race, religion, and mental health stigma:

Imagine dealing with it as a Black man living with depression… and also being told in church on Sunday that if you die by suicide, you go to hell.

This double burden—of discrimination and suppression—makes it especially difficult for people of color to seek help. Cultural narratives of toughness, resilience, or religious condemnation compound the shame.

It’s essential to create culturally responsive and safe spaces for healing. This means not just outreach but inclusion—representation in therapy, peer support, leadership, and storytelling.

8. Cultural Myths About ‘Toughness’ Are Holding Us Back

Victor shared:

People who experience depression or anxiety are just demonstrating spiritual or moral weakness.

The myth of “just tough it out” is deeply ingrained in American society. Phrases like “man up” or “pull yourself together” have done real harm. They invalidate legitimate pain and discourage seeking help.

Resilience does not mean silence. True strength involves vulnerability, self-awareness, and asking for support when it’s needed.

9. Society Has Evolved on Other Taboos—Mental Health Should Be Next

Victor noted:

There was a time when you didn’t say the word ‘cancer’ out loud. So I think as a society, we do evolve.

Mental health deserves the same shift that once transformed how we talk about cancer, addiction, and sexuality. By moving from fear to understanding, we can destigmatize depression and anxiety.

Schools, faith communities, and media outlets must take active roles in this evolution. Education and conversation change culture. The time is now.

10. Depression Isn’t Who You Are—But It Can Shape Who You Become

Lauren Brady wrote:

Be proud of yourself every day… When every day is a fight, the strength to keep fighting is an immense feat.

She continued:

The tears that you shed and the cries let out do not make you weak. It proves that you have the strength to acknowledge your own pain and to let those around you see the pain you’re holding on to.

These reflections reframe depression as a source of strength rather than shame.

Depression can be a teacher. It builds empathy, courage, and resilience. Those who survive it often develop a deeper capacity to care for others and a refined sense of purpose.

11. You’re Not Alone. Your Life Matters.

Victor reassured listeners:

No, I don’t fully understand the depth of your pain. No one ever fully understands another person’s pain. But I do know that you matter. Your life matters. You are enough. And you are not alone.

Sometimes, the most healing words are the simplest ones. Being reminded that you are not alone can shift a person’s perspective in a dark moment.

Connection is one of the strongest antidotes to depression. Whether it comes through community, therapy, friendship, or storytelling—finding your people matters.

Final Thoughts

This episode of the Giving Voice to Depression podcast is more than a conversation—it’s a call to reevaluate how we talk about, treat, and understand mental health. Victor Armstrong’s wisdom reminds us that while pain may be deeply personal, the fight for dignity, understanding, and change is collective.

The journey of mental health recovery is not linear. It’s filled with setbacks, resilience, and revelations. But the act of continuing—of choosing to keep going—is one of the most courageous decisions a person can make.

Let this article be a reminder that there is strength in your struggle, hope in your honesty, and power in your voice.

Key Takeaways

• Depression is a legitimate medical condition, not a sign of weakness. Mental health deserves the same seriousness and support as physical health.
• People with depression are among the strongest individuals. The internal battles they fight are invisible but deeply demanding.
• Shame and silence fuel suffering. Speaking openly about mental illness helps dissolve stigma and build community.
• Culture plays a role in how we treat mental illness. Faith, race, gender, and societal norms all impact how people understand and cope with depression.
• Awareness must be paired with access. True change requires affordable, inclusive, and equitable mental health services.
• Representation matters. Mental health advocacy must include diverse voices and lived experiences, especially from historically marginalized groups.
• Kindness saves lives. Checking in, offering support, and reminding someone that they matter can be more impactful than we realize.
• Recovery is possible. With support, treatment, and understanding, people can and do get better.
• Everyone has a role to play. Whether you’re struggling or supporting, your awareness and actions can help create a more compassionate world.