Learn 5 Things Recovery Taught Me (A...

5 Things Recovery Taught Me (And Why I’m Grateful)

Word 'wonder' written in sand on beach at sunset, symbolizing gratitude and discovery in addiction recovery
By
Olivia Pennelle profile
Olivia Pennelle
Olivia Pennelle profile
Olivia Pennelle
Author

Located in Portland, OR, Olivia Pennelle (Liv) is an experienced writer, journalist, and coach. She is the founder of the popular site Liv’s Recovery Kitchen, a site dedicated to helping people flourish in their recovery.

Updated July 17, 2023

I entered into recovery feeling completely broken – like I was shattered into a million little pieces. But recovery taught me I didn’t need to fix myself. In fact, I learned how to weave those pieces into a beautiful mosaic and love every inch of it.

The lessons in recovery are endless and sometimes they come all at once. There are times when I struggle to catch my breath. I feel like I can’t cope…yet, I do. Over the course of the last five years, I’ve grown up, developed my identity, accepted who I am, learned how to integrate in this world, and gained new coping strategies.

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It’s hard to distill five years of recovery knowledge into five distinct points, but I’ll try.

1. I Am Enough

I’ve spent my entire life feeling desperate to be liked. I tried to morph into the size and shape acceptable to others. It never worked – I was just too out of it to realize that. Sobriety awakened my sense of reality. I finally saw I’m okay just as I am. I learned I don’t need to change myself for others to like me. As long as I’m true to myself and confident being that person, people will either like me or they won’t – and that’s no reflection of my self-worth. I am worthy without the validation of others.

2. I Learned Who I Am

Over the last five years, I’ve taken the time to get to know me: who I am, what makes me tick – my values, moral compass, boundaries – my likes, my dislikes, my passions. I learned I have a strong sense of justice, I’m creative, and I can cook and write (well). My writing voice has become my biggest gift; I‘ve developed a worldwide voice that has now become my career.

3. I Can Do Anything

I’ve lived in the depths of despair – where I was faced with a choice between suicide or recovery. That was my rock bottom. I chose recovery, witnessed my own transformation, and realized I could do anything. I tested this theory numerous times: I changed jobs, lost 60 pounds, became a blogger, moved to a new continent, and stopped letting others control my life. Those challenges weren’t without fear, but I achieved them.

4. Everything Will Be Okay

Growing up, I never had this affirmation. I sought validation and safety in all of my relationships. I always feared the worst and had a constant feeling of doom. By reaching out and trying new things, I learned everything would be okay. Recovery isn’t without hardship and problems, but I’m always okay.

5. You Have a Choice

You can choose to live in addictive behaviors – fear, anger, obsession, escapism – or you can choose recovery and deal with the issues you’re trying to avoid or escape. Invariably, the problems are usually never as big as they feel and they’re infinitely easier to deal with when you’re present in your own life.

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FAQs

A: Through recovery, you may see that your value is not based on past mistakes, other people’s approval, or how quickly you heal. The process of recovery improves health and wellness, guides you to live a self-directed life, and ultimately leads you to live up to your full potential, which supports the idea that recovery is about rebuilding a healthy sense of self, not just stopping substance use.

A: In recovery, you are likely to spend time learning about you values, boundaries, interests, and goals because life becomes less centered on substance use and more centered on purpose. Purpose, health, home, and community are core dimensions of recovery, showing that recovery is about more than staying sober, it’s about building a healthy identity and a meaningful life.

A: Recovery can build confidence because it asks you to do hard things consistently, like asking for help, learning coping skills, and making major life changes over time. Addiction is treatable and recovery supports people in stopping substance use and resuming productive lives, which explains why many people come away feeling more capable than they thought they were.

A: Recovery often becomes more manageable as people build routines, support systems, and healthier ways to respond to stress, but it is usually a long-term process rather than a quick fix. Relapse can happen and should be treated as a signal to restart or adjust care, which means progress is real even when recovery is not perfectly linear.

A: Gratitude can help you shift attention away from shame, fear, and constant negative thinking, which may improve emotional well-being and stress coping. Practicing gratitude may support emotional well-being. Gratitude practices can increase calm and lower stress, which is why gratitude is often seen as a helpful recovery habit.

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