Alyson Stoner & Correy O’Neal: Healing Sibling Trauma with Somatic Therapy | Breaking the Cycle of Family Dysfunction

Disrupted Attachment and the False Narrative of a Biological Parent

Another deep source of trauma for both siblings was the manipulated relationship with their biological father following the move and divorce. Correy, as the oldest, felt lucky to have had “the most time with him” before the move, noting him as the “only person that I can reflect back on that was reliable.” However, the “rules in our California home” demanded they maintain a “facade of perfection” which included the expectation that they cut their father off. As a child, concerned about safety, Correy felt she had to comply, cutting off the one person she believed to be truly trustworthy.

Alyson, who was much younger, was presented with a “completely different narrative about who he was,” leading them to grow up “not trusting him at all” and perceiving him as someone who didn’t care enough to see them. This manipulative narrative around a loving parent is a severe form of psychological abuse that isolates children from a vital source of support.

Years later, Alyson’s adult decision to seek a “rounder picture” by getting their father’s input led to a tender moment when he showed them a “pile of news clippings and articles and different things that reminded him of my the personality he knew I had, at least as a little one.”

Correy also revealed a powerful, hidden memory: “My dad sent me a cell phone, so I had an Ohio cell phone number, and he said, if we ever need him to call.” This phone, a forbidden lifeline, was a “physical representation” of his attempt to provide a secure attachment despite being actively kept away, a testament to the powerful, protective bond he sought to maintain.

The Convergence of Adult Struggles: Addiction and Perfectionism as Trauma Responses

Despite growing up with distinct coping styles, both siblings’ young adult lives were marked by similar struggles: addiction, disordered eating, and hyper-perfectionism. They recognized that the chaotic and substance-filled environment of their childhood home had established a “paradigm around using something to feel a certain way or get a certain thing,” which was “pretty deeply embedded in the house.” They saw escapism modeled through “substance,” “yo yo dieting,” and the ubiquitous presence of “alcoholism” and “pills” as the only adult methods for “dealing with life.”

The most significant barrier to seeking help was the rigid control over their image. Correy recounted a chilling moment of self-harming “as a hope to be seen and helped,” only to be told, “put long sleeves on.” This reinforced the absolute necessity of the exterior facade, actively shutting down any possibility of discussing struggle or need for support. This is a clear example of how a family can condition a child into a maladaptive response to trauma.

From Rock Bottom to Recovery: The Decision for Change

For both siblings, the decision to pursue recovery was not a single, courageous moment, but a desperate, gradual sequence of decisions made at rock bottom. Alyson described the severity of their situation as a “life or death decision,” where they finally realized they wouldn’t make it unless they did something different. Their path was one of “micro steps of just having a flash of insight, recognizing something needs to change, looking for a resource.”

Correy’s rock bottom involved a physical escape at age 17 after she experienced physical assault and attempts to get help from school counselors and CPS failed. Her “first step in wanting something different” was leaving, an event that culminated in all her clothes “in garbage bags on the front lawn.” This act of being forced out, followed by a period of homelessness—living in her car, afraid to be too far from her neighborhood—was a “crumbling.”

“I hit a rock bottom with an eating disorder. I hit a rock bottom with, um, a substance abuse addiction. I hit a rock bottom. Like with relational addictions,” Correy recalled. Her ultimate turning point was a realization: “If I have no joy, then what is all this for?” This profound question forced a significant change in both environment and behavior.

Hyper-Independence as a Survival Skill and Barrier to Support

The siblings’ shared experience of being treated like “adults” or being expected to “figure it out” created a profound sense of hyper-independence. Correy described herself as the “figure it out person” and “the oldest daughter,” a role she “had to be.”

When a child is relied upon—whether as an emotional support, a confidante, or the primary income earner—they are forced into a premature parental role. This creates a deep-seated inability to ask for help, a key symptom of a trauma-induced coping mechanism.

The absence of competent adult modeling meant they had to constantly “figure out, so what is healthy then? What is functional? What does healing look like?” They relied on searching Google and reading books rather than consulting a human, demonstrating the lasting distrust in the reliability of other people. The “concept of my friends wanting to go to a relative for advice was not something that I could relate to,” Alyson admitted, underscoring the lack of a reliable, guiding “manual” in their lives.

The Healing Bridge: Somatic Psychotherapy and the Body’s Truth

The final, beautiful convergence of their recovery paths was through somatic-focused, body-centered tools. Alyson started exploring these tools to address health issues and physical symptoms that standard mental health approaches weren’t alleviating. They noted that their body actually did remember their father to be trustworthy, even when their mind, clouded by the false narrative, did not.

Somatic psychotherapy focuses on the mind-body connection, helping individuals process and release trauma stored in the body by tuning into physical sensations. The body, the nervous system, and not just the mind, hold the imprints of trauma. By reconnecting with their physical selves and processing the physiological responses linked to traumatic experiences, they found a path to healing the root cause of their anxiety, hypervigilance, and emotional numbness. This shared, body-centered healing language became the “shared experience” that allowed them to finally tiptoe their way back into communication and reconcile, realizing they had been healing in parallel.

The Systemic Nature of Recovery: Healing the Family Unit

The siblings’ story is a powerful illustration of the systemic nature of addiction and trauma recovery. When one person in a family unit struggles, it affects everyone, and similarly, true healing for one often requires a systemic shift that influences others.

• Individual Recovery: Alyson and Correy had to first prioritize their individual safety, separation, and mental health through their own “rock bottoms” and years of therapy.
• Systemic Repair: Their shared language of somatic healing acted as a “bridge” over the years of triangulation and isolation, allowing them to finally validate each other’s distinct traumatic experiences and begin to heal the fractured sibling relationship.
• Post-Traumatic Growth: The engagement of all family members in recovery is crucial for long-term psychosocial stability. Their reconnection represents a vital step in this systemic repair, where the individuals who were isolated by the trauma are now unified by their journey through it, becoming sources of strength for one another.

Alyson and Correy’s journey from isolated survival to shared recovery offers a profound message of hope: even when two people live through the same trauma, the path to healing will look different, but it is possible for those paths to converge in a powerful and redemptive way.

Breaking the Cycle: The Role of Service and New Parenthood

Correy, now a parent, spoke movingly about how having her own children has become a form of “therapy,” allowing her to reparent herself and give “so much more grace to my younger self.” She and Alyson also found a shared mission in service as co-founders of Movement Genius, leveraging their lived experience to build global campaigns centered on human well-being. This pivot to service is a form of post-traumatic growth, transforming their pain into purpose and building the support they never had for others.

Their decision to share their story publicly, together for the first time, not only validates their experiences but offers a crucial resource for others. It emphasizes that individual recovery is valid, even if it looks messy, and that the ultimate goal is not perfection, but a genuine, joyous life forged from the ashes of trauma.